Dec. 29, 2003: An indecent proposal

tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10971908.post-1119632703575226932005-06-24T09:53:00.000-05:002005-06-27T11:45:28.583-05:00Dec. 29, 2003: An indecent proposalWell, Alan and I are on for Saturday night. In his confirmation email, he remarked on the day's football games and said that he'd pick up a movie and come over. No mention of sex or "clicking," thankfully. Today is my last day as a MM subscriber, and I have three emails, including another from NEVERTELL, the unhappily married guy looking for a long-term affair. He uses the same subject line—"u"—he must think it endearing. One of the others is from an NRA member in Detroit, one of those guys who describes himself as having "very good looks" but neglects to put his money where his mouth is by posting a photo. Where the profile asks "what brought you here," he chose the response "Scouting around for people to do things with." In Chicago? At least in his email, he writes he wished he lived closer. Whatever. FUNGUY862 writes that my profile and photos caught his eye. I think his email is boilerplate because that's the extent to which he references my profile. He writes that he likes running and biking, so I'll earn extra points if I like either activity. If he read my profile, he'd know I run—I mention it at least once, possibly twice. Plus, he's 5'9"-5'10". Good Lord! Another MM email just came in, this one totally enticing. I mean, filthy. It's captioned with "Can you imagine?" How fitting that it arrives on my last day on MM: "I would love to meet you at the Fairmont hotel downtown. I would insist that you cum [such clever wordplay] with no panties on and a long coat with nothing on underneath. You would meet me at the sports bar right next to the lobby. Without any conversation you would simply walk up to me and say 'are you ready'? At this point we would proceed up to the top floor and walk around to the stairway and walk up two addition flights. There we would see a dark room, which is the broiler room. During this adventure I haven’t said one word to you. You are simply following me knowing at some point we will be sexually intertwined. I turn to you and unbutton your long coat only to see those nice ass tits beaming in my face. I caution myself to take my time because looking at this body…………..poetry has just been put in motion so I must handle your body like a precious jewel. I start by pulling you towards me and touching your lips with my fingers while you close your eyes and slowing suck as if you are auditioning for the anticipated moment of sucking my cock. My lips touch yours and we are both highly impressed with the tongue technique and the soft lips. My hands go through your hair and I start kissing your neck slowing turning you around. Your head goes back and you reach back and grab my long hard cock and start to stroke it. At this point I ask you 'would you like to go to a room'? You reply with 'yes'! Once in the room, I have already set up candles. The room is dark and I tell you to lie on the bed face down. I start perusing your body with me tongue and nibbling on back of your neck again for a few minutes before moving down your spine until I reach the crack of your ass. I then tell you to slightly lift your ass to the sky maintaining your chest on the bed………………….your knees slightly move upward and your ass is pointing to the sky. I then whisper to you 'spread your legs and place both hands on your ass checks and open your ass'. When you accommodate my wishes, you are telling me 'please be gentle, and make me feel extremely good'! I typically have strawberry ice cream, ice or whip cream ready to go into battle. I start by moving my tongue from the top of your ass crack down to the point of entrance of your ass. Making your ass extremely wet while simultaneously placing a small hidden vibrator on your clit. So while you are getting your ass licked with ice cream or whip cream, you are also about to reach orgasm. I start to rotate from licking your ass to licking your clit. At this point we are in the 69 position. Would you like me to continue? I can send a picture upon request!" Where to start? At least he has good taste in hotels, but strawberry ice cream? C'mon (or should I say "Cum on"?)—go with chocolate or maybe fudge ripple. I'm also intrigued by the broiler room—can I get a steak as part of this fantasy? Am I the only one thinking this guy works on the Fairmont maintenance staff? According to his profile, BMALE296 is Democrat who works out and reads. He's also usually early—I bet you are, BMALE. On a first date, he'd expect a handshake; he doesn't specify what body part the hand would shake. Oh, and he has a Matchmarker. So perfect, and yet … Over in Yahoo, nine Icebreakers beg for my attention—ugh. Younghardcutie is neither young nor cute. Intelligent_kind_athletic is 5'8" and doesn't drink. He hopes to visit "Stone Hedge" someday. Boddhisatvabanker is 44-year-old, 5'10" attorney with a shaved head. Comehavefunoutside is 43, lives far away, looks dorky. He's seeking for a partner for outside activities like fishing, hunting, skiing, and the zoo. I'm not much for activities that involve being cold. Misterjones80 is 30 and posted a bare-bones profile. Bumpedintome is a 44-year-old suburbanite with white hair who specifies "NO PLUS SIZES." I find that so rude. How 'bout just deleting emails from women who don't interest you? Elainepanterwhateverhighandtight (that's mouthful) is 5'10", black, and gives up little in his profile. Rusty204gamer is 54 and lives with his parents. Need I go on? I don't think so, but I can't resist adding that his profile says "Laughter is important to me, as well as wargaming …" The latest Icebreaker comes from jrow96, whose profile has actually caught my eye in the past. He "smokes often," though, lives in Schaumburg, and uses "LOL" repeatedly in his profile. And, let's not forget that he didn't even email me, but only sent a lame-ass Icebreaker. Not that it needs repeating, but I view those guys with disfavor right off the bat. Feeling as I do about Icebreakers, I don't know why I even check them in Yahoo. I don't monitor the ones in Match very often. Speaking of Match, my profile has now notched almost 3,500 visits. Brutal—thousands have seen and thousands have turned away.Bemusednoreply@blogger.com